Four Pretty Darn Exhausted Women
|"Four Pretty Darn Exhausted Women"|
|Episode no.||Season 11|
|Directed by||Season Atkins|
|Written by||Hillary & Luka Runecraft|
|Original air date||October 7, 2022|
"Four Pretty Darn Exhausted Women" is the seventh episode of the eleventh season of Queen of the Willis. The episode first broadcasted on first-run syndication in the United States on May 10, 2009 and tells five tales of famous women featuring Queen of the Willis characters in various roles: Angie Willis as Queen Elizabeth I, Pamhouser as Snow White, Brynn Willis as Cinderella, Stephanie Rose as Lady Macbeth, and Avril Lavinge, Alisan Porter, and Karly Jameson as themselves performing as contestants on American Idol.
Pamhouser, Avril Lavinge, Alisan Porter, and Karly Jameson go to a nail salon and day spa for ther manicure and pedicure, prompting a debate as to whether women can simultaneously be smart, powerful and beautiful.
Queen Elizabeth I
Various royal suitors wish to win the hand of Queen Elizabeth, including a flamboyant King Julio of Spain. The Queen rejects his advances and King Julio vows revenge on England, summoning the Spanish Armada. Meanwhile, Walter Raleigh, played by Ava Willis, falls for Queen Elizabeth's Lady in Waiting, played by Laura Donaldson.
When Elizabeth catches the two making out, she sentences them to execution. They are saved at the last minute when Miles dashes in, reporting the arrival of the Spanish Armada. Ava leads an English naval offense against the Armada, defeating them by accidentally setting the lone English warship on fire, which then spreads to the entire Spanish fleet. Queen Elizabeth knights him and then proclaims, "I don't need a man, for I have England" (with Miles sarcastically quipping, "Yeah, you keep telling yourself that").
In the second tale, Avril tells the story of Snow White, with Pamhouser in the title role.
Her version features the male and trans-female dwarves Crappy (Eric Halvorson), Drunky (Melissa Rose), Hungry (Tabby Willis), Greedy (Kendra), Tranny (Ava Willis), Stubby (Zoey Tur) and Doc (Doctor Coxson). When the wicked queen (Mayor Pence) learns from her magic UHD television that Snow White is fairer than she is, she dispatches her huntswoman (Mandy Willis) to murder the young maiden. However, Mandy the huntswoman cannot bring herself to cut out her heart (or to cut out a pig's heart or to cut a heart out of construction paper for that matter) and Snow White runs away to the forest, seeking shelter in the dwarves' cottage. She keeps house for them while they work in the mines but the wicked queen, disguised as an old woman, physically forces Snow White to eat a poisoned apple. She escapes the dwarves, only to be brutally lynched by an angry group of woodland animals. In Pamhouser's version, Snow White does not need a man to wake her but is brought back to life by a female doctor (Marci Bowers).
In the third tale, Alisan tells the story of Cinderella, whith Brynn in the title role.
Cinderella (played by Brynn) is forced to work for her mean stepsisters (played by Brittany, Rhonda, Suzanne, Emilie, Hillary and Luanne) when a message arrives with an invitation to a ball by Prince Charming (played by Dan Daniels). Cinderella arrives, ready to go to the ball with her stepfamily, but her stepsisters tear the dress at the urging of her stepmother (played by Angie). Her fairy godmother (played by Heather) arrives and grants her a new dress and carriage (made from the medieval version of Ava) to go to the ball as well as turning the dog (played by Tabby) into a horse to pull the carriage. At the ball, Prince Charming meets the evil stepsisters and rejects their advances but falls for Cinderella. After they dance and start to kiss, the clock strikes midnight and Cinderella is forced to flee losing her glass slipper on the way out. The next day, Prince Charming orders the Captain of the Guards (played by Shushu) to send out his men to search for the girl whose foot will fit the slipper. After failed attempts at the houses of different women (two of which were played by Laura Donaldson and Mandy Willis), Prince Charming and his men arrive at Cinderella's house. Before Prince Charming can try the glass slipper on the stepsisters, he meets Cinderella as his dream girl and they were married until they separated seven months later in order to renew their relationship.
Stephanie (parodying Lady Macbeth) is frustrated with everything. Not only does she have to clean the costumes worn by the other actors, but is also criticized by the director for not doing a proper job of it. Adding to her frustrations is that Melissa does not have the title role in a Quillsville production of Macbeth and instead plays a tree (which she is overly pleased with as she is uninterested in auditioning for lead roles). She convinces her to murder the lead actor, Ava Willis. Melissa follows her command and then assumes the role of Macbeth. However, her performance receives unfavorable reviews compared with the more seasoned actors and even those with no lines. After the next performance reviews, Kymberly and Adelle points out to Stephanie that they agree with the reviews and warns her that her ruthless and devious ambitions will come back to haunt her one day. Even a remorseful Melissa agrees and tries in vain to convince her to have someone else be the lead role and let him go back to her original role as a tree. Furious, Stephanie refuses and orders a more reluctant Melissa to continue her killing spree until she is the only actor left.
While scrubbing the blood from the costumes, Stephanie fumes over Melissa screwing up and making a mess in the costumes. She is visited by the angry spirits of the actors she has murdered. She tries to put the blame on her transgendered wife, but they refuse to believe her. Ava Willis tells Stephanie that she and the other spirits knew that Melissa was a victim herself in her devious plans. Kendra agrees and mentions that she should have listened to her sisters when she had the chance. Dr. Coxson tells Stephanie that her ambitions in killing them in order for Melissa to play the lead role, had done her in. Finally in the form of revenge for her actions, the angry spirits kill Stephanie by causing a fright-induced heart attack. In her memory (or rather, by her spirit force, since she apparently has not learned her lesson or anything from the experience), Melissa performs a stirring soliloquy in the empty theater. Stephanie's ghost appears in the audience and is overjoyed by her effort. She raves that Melissa has finally given a great performance for her and urges her to appear in more Shakespearean plays by tossing scripts in front of her. However much to Stephanie's chagrin, Melissa decides to take the easy way out by killing herself so she does not have to audition any more. In her ghost form, a pleased Melissa tells her off that auditioning for those plays would be a real tragedy for her and is free to be lazy. A frustrated Stephanie learns her lesson the hard way when she realizes that she has to spend the rest of eternity with a lazy and happy Melissa.
Avril, Alisan & Karly
Avril, Alisan and Karly's performances are squashed by an oppressive vocalist (Josh Kaufman) who has gotten standing ovations. They perform twice, all of which are outperformed by Kaufman, who is later disqualified and had been against Avril, Alisan, Karly, and Danielle Bradbery. During the semi-final (Top 4) result, Karly, Avril, and Alisan move on and Danielle Bradbery is eliminated. In the American Idol finale, Alisan finishes in third place and Karly wins with Avril finishing runner-up.
- "October is Optimum on Fox 12 (WLIN-FTV)".
- "Alisan, Avril, and Karly Sings!".